Focus: 21 questions to answer before saying “Yes I do”
Apart from salvation, the greatest gift God gave to us is the access to revelation in the word. The BIBLE is an acronym of Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth. When you neglect the scriptures, you suffer fractures.
Many prepare for wedding and not for marriage. If a marriage stands the first 5 years, the marriage is likely to stand strong. What is needed in getting marriage and staying in a marriage is “WISDOM” Finding the right partner and deciding on your choice is done with KNOWLEDGE; Knowledge simply means what you KNOW that gives you an EDGE
Isaiah 34:16 :- Seek ye out of the book of the lord and read, none shall fail, none shall want her mate (Partner). Before you get married to your partner, you should first marry the bible.
When we given an opportunity to choose in life, we don’t choose our father, mother, aunties or uncles, siblings or children. The only choice we have is to choose our live partners.
Its better to marry late and get it right than to marry early and always fight. Marriage is not by force, but by choice.
Numbers 36:6 :- Let them marry who they think is best from them but only to the family of the tribe of their father.
Enhancing the quality of your choice will preserve your marriage. 1 Corinth 7:10, it said I command, let not the wife depart from her husband. Verse 11 says, if she decides to depart, let her remain unmarried and let not the husband put his wife away.
Questions that needs answers before marriage.
- Question of Redemption. As a child of God, you are restricted to marry only a genuine believer (2 Corinth 6:14)
- Question of Character. In marriage, you don’t marry the person, you marry the character. I Sam 25:3, Abigail was of good understanding and a beautiful countenance but got married to Nabal who was churlish and evil in his doing; IN verse 17 and 18, Abigail saved the man from Davids wrath. Character sustains destiny. Proverb 21:19, its better to live in the desert than to live with an angered woman. Wedding is not a divine encounter, the attitude one puts up before a marriage is what is to be expected after marriage. Proverb 27:15.
- Question of Maturity. How matured are both of you? Its not in the age. Its in the ability to take responsibility of marriage. Some individuals do not have the maturity to handle some common situations which may occur in a relationship.
- Question of Vision. Marriage itself is not an end but a means to an end. Your partner is someone that should help you to accomplish your vision. Exodus 18:1-3; Abraham’s marriage was not all juicy. No one heard of Moses children, 1 Sam 9: 1-3, Samuel has issues with his children, Lot married from Sodom and Gomorrah which was a wrong place.
- Question of Competence. Competence talks about knowing what marriage entails. Marriage does not work by luck, it works by hard-work and dedication.
- Question of the Issue of Peace. Is there peace in your relationship? If there is no peace before the union, there will be no peace in the home. The peace factor is the God-Factor in a marriage.
- Question of Love. Love is the bedrock of every genuine marital relationship. When love is absent, the center cant hold. Does he or she genuinely love you? There is a difference between love and lust.
a) LUST is interested in what it can take, LOVE is interested in what it can give.
b) LUST depreciate people, while LOVE elevates people.
c) LUST is temporal, LOVE is everlasting.
d) LUST fades with time, LOVE never fades
e) LUST is of the head, LOVE is of the heart.
In 1 Samuel 18, Jonathan and Davids relationship was likened to a married couple. Love is more than en emotional and psychological feeling, its a commitment we make everyday. Love is a commitment you make consciously and its renewed everyday.
- Question of Respect. How does he treat me? Does he respect me? Your partner should respect and celebrate you. Ephesians 5:51, submitting yourselves to one another.
- Question to Submission. Can your partner submit to you? A woman that does not genuinely respect a man can never submit to a man. Submission means to willingly put yourself under the control or authority of your partner.
- Question of Job. Before one can get married, one needs a job. One should be working to have a stable source of income before he can do the talk of marriage. Whatever your hand findeth to do, do it well.
- Question of Liberality. Any love that is not giving is fake. Its possible to give and get something but its not applied to love. Genuine love is a giving love. Matthew 6:21, for where your treasure is, your heart is. Giving Is an attitude and lifestyle. If you love God, how much have you spent in the house of God and compare it to your attires.